Bobby Allyn

A Wedding

I officiated a wedding in September of 2019. Below is a text of the ceremony.

All of us have witnessed how the tradition of marriage is under a major transformation right now. The days of marital unions for financial security, having kids, social status just don’t cut it any more. 

So why get married? I posed this question to a couple who asked me to officiate their wedding.

Firstly, I’d like to point out neither were shy to respond in unison, “Because we love each other.” “Because we are in love.”

I said, “Well, you can love many things, but you don’t marry them. Why get married? Why now? Why each other?”

She quickly said, “We don’t have to be married. It’s a symbol of our unity.”

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He followed, “It’s a way to proclaim our love. We are a partnership.” Then He paused and said a little quieter, “She’s my best friend.”

She added to what He said with, “I want the adventure of going through life together. Together it’s easier.”

We talked for a while about love, marriage, partnership and a few things became intensely clear for me:

Firstly, He and She have loved each other forever, before they even met their souls were entwined. And they will always love each. Their love, their union has always been and always will be.

The second thing that became clear to me is how He and She serve as a mirror for one another. What I mean by this is how She sees him is how He will see himself. And as how He sees her is how She will see herself. This creates a great deal of responsibility to reflect one another in a most loving and beautiful way.

Think about a reflection. No two are the same. If it’s a reflection in a mirror, it may be very clear. A reflection can be in water where ripples lilt through it. Maybe the reflection is your face in the toaster as you walk by it in the morning. One way or another, you are seeing yourself through something, or someone, else.

Although no two reflections are the same, all reflections require one component and that is light. You cannot have a reflection without light. What is light? Light is clarity. Light is brilliance. Light is hope. Light is warmth. Light is the magnificence of the sun in all its glory and splendor. Without the sun, without light, we have no life.

He and She provide light to one another. They provide each other the warmth of friendship. They provide each other the hope of a beautiful future together. They provide each other the clarity of commitment and devotion to the other. To each other they are the brilliance, the glory and the splendor of love.

The earth has never seen this specific, incredible light before; what He and She have created together, in their own way. What they have created together enhances us all. Its not about success and there is never any failure when you are motivated by love. May they live their love their way with the same veracity and vivaciousness of when I asked She and He, ” Why get married?” and they both pounced on the question with conviction and clarity.

So may they be best friends. May they light up their lives up, and ours, with how they love each other, how they always have and how they always will love each other. Reflect on this image not only of what your eyes see, but what your soul sees in them.

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